Errors from partner that destroys relationships:
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Introducing the topic:
Statistics show that in western societies over 50% of marriages end in divorce. Meanwhile, the vast majority of relationships fall apart long before getting married.
All these relationships do not end without reason. There are many factors that affect this, but one of the most common is the breakdown of the balance of feeling – That means letting the situation occur in which one side tries a lot more than the other. It produces a vicious circle in which one person moves away more and more and the other wants to stop this from happening showing even more feelings in the process.
MISTAKES YOU NEED TO AVOID AS A PARTNER TO SAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
In this video I’ll tell you about the mistake you need to avoid to stop this vicious circle:
- The balance of feeling: To begin with, the balance of feelings will not suffer when you show your feelings in a positive way. Example, telling your partner how much you love them If this is not exaggerating But this is weakened, when you do it negatively Thus, the most common mistake that kills relationships are claims that the other person isn’t showing you enough interest Let’s see an example of how this works
A girl calls her boyfriend He did not answer, so she sends him a text message “Hi honey, what’s up?” The man is at work; he sees that the girl called him and wrote, but he’s busy and focused on something else, so he doesn’t have time to write back immediately. The girl did not get a response, so she feels ignored.
She assumes that he is not interested. She takes the lack of response personally, when she meets the guy, she starts complaining about this and an argument ensues. After several similar actions, the man already feels annoyed and actually begins to care a little less – Instead of meeting his girlfriend he will increasingly prefer to meet with his mates.
- Don’t Nag too much or be nosy
Then the girlfriend starts to have even more issues with him. Do you prefer your friends over me?! You were supposed to call me! You promised me a meeting and now you’re canceling it?! The more demands she has, the more the man distances himself. He shows her less and less affection – The woman feels this and thus feels more and more threatened by other women, so she also starts showing a lot of jealousy. So again, in a negative way, she shows him how much she cares for him shaking the balance of feelings even more.
Over time, there is more and more blame, outright hostility appears. The man can’t stand this and breaks up with his partner. This was just an example of this type of situation which constantly happens to the clients I council every day.
This principle works for both sides:
- Don’t demand more attention from your partner:
Men also make the same mistakes. Most importantly, however, this vicious cycle can be stopped at any time, and the balance of feelings can usually be remedied. The most important thing however, is not to commit further mistakes. So you shouldn’t demand more attention from your partner and tell him that he’s not showing you enough of it.
For example, when he doesn’t pick up the phone or doesn’t write back. When he gives you reasons to be jealous, when he cancels or postpones a meeting with you – In these situations you always have to keep calm, of course you can and often should talk about this later, but always do it calmly and without affection.
4.Never take offense:
This is the behavior of primary school children and not adults. Such behavior also affects the balance of feelings very negatively. If your partner wants to do something you may not like, example go to a party or cancel the meeting with you, then let him do it. Give him as much freedom as they need, because stopping them by intervening will only be more of a problem for you.
When you stop driving him away by continuous demands or by not allowing them to do something, their feelings will strengthen and behaviors that result from lack of interest will appear less and less. To maintaining the right balance of feelings just remember to give your partner as much space and freedom as possible. And do it as soon as possible, because if not, it might be too late.
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See you next week! Robert Marchel